Ever wonder what separates champions from everyone else?
It's not that they don't fail. It's what they do in the moments right after.
I stood frozen on stage, sweat beading on my forehead, as 300 college athletes stared back at me in awkward silence.
I had just bombed. Hard.
First year as a keynote speaker, and I'd decided to "wing" a story I thought would land perfectly. It didn't. The audience called me out, and in that moment, I wanted to crawl into a hole and disappear.
But there was nowhere to hide.
That painful moment taught me something most people never learn: it's not the failure that defines you—it's what you do in the space immediately after.
THE FAILURE FALLACY 🔥
Most people get this entirely wrong.
They either:
- Fear failure so much that they never take action, or
- Fail, dust themselves off, and blindly charge back in making the same mistakes
Both approaches guarantee mediocrity.
"Success is stumbling from failure to failure with no loss of enthusiasm." - Winston Churchill
But Churchill left something out: you need to stumble smarter each time.
THE GAP BETWEEN AVERAGE AND EXCELLENT ⚡
The real competitive advantage isn't found in natural talent or even relentless hustle.
It's in what you do between failures.
After my on-stage disaster, I had a choice: quit speaking forever (tempting) or extract every lesson possible from that moment.
I chose the latter, and it transformed my approach forever. No more "winging it." Ever. Every story, every transition, every moment would be rehearsed until it was bulletproof.
That's how winners move differently.
They fail. They pause. They evaluate. Then they go again—smarter.
According to research from the Harvard Business School, organizations with formal processes to analyze failures see up to 74% higher long-term performance than those without such practices.
The same principle applies to individual performance.
YOUR 4-STEP FAILURE FRAMEWORK 💯
When you miss the mark (and you will), don't rush to "try again." Instead:
1️⃣ What did I do well? Don't skip this. Even in disaster, there are wins. Name them. Build on them.
2️⃣ Why did I miss my goal? No sugar-coating. No excuses. What actually happened?
3️⃣ Where exactly did I go wrong? Vague assessments produce vague improvements. Pinpoint the exact moment, decision, or action that derailed you.
4️⃣ What's the most important first step now? Not ten steps. One. What's the single next move that matters most?
This isn't just reflection—it's strategic reconnaissance.
DO THIS TODAY: Take your most recent setback and give yourself 15 uninterrupted minutes to run it through this framework. Write down your answers to all four questions.
TURN YOUR FAILURES FROM COSTS INTO INVESTMENTS 📈
If you keep failing and restarting without this process, you're not persevering—you're playing a never-ending game of Groundhog Day.
Insanity is doing the same thing repeatedly and expecting different results.
The space you create to assess and adjust? That's not just your competitive edge — it's your unfair advantage.
Most people around you are either too afraid to fail or failing the same way repeatedly.
You'll be different. You'll fail forward.
A study in the Journal of Experimental Social Psychology found that those who analyzed their failures improved their subsequent performance by up to 23% compared to those who simply practiced more without analysis.
FINAL THOUGHTS 💭
Winners move fast—but they move smarter first.
(And if you want help learning ways to rebound from failure faster, consider my Competitor Mindset self-guided program here!)
I'm cheering for you, Reader,
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Competitive Reflection
What recent failure are you grateful for because of what it taught you? How will you approach your next attempt differently?